Being in love with a narcissist involves complex dynamics where one partner exhibits traits of narcissism—excessive self-focus, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. This situation significantly affects individuals by undermining their self-esteem, manipulating their emotions, and isolating them from their support networks. This unhealthy relationship can harm family structures and children’s behaviour, creating cycles of narcissism and co-dependency. Addressing this issue is crucial for the well-being of individuals involved, as well as societal and future generations. Recognizing and addressing narcissistic behaviour can lead to personal empowerment, healthier relationships, and breaking patterns of abuse. A few days ago, I asked people to share their views on this subject.
“When it’s a partner, they start by love-bombing you. They make you see them as what you have been praying for. They will carefully keep you away from all your closest friends and family. They’ll give you all the love you have ever prayed for. The moment they start, they gaslight, lie, manipulate, cheat. They drain you emotionally, and financially, but you can’t leave them. Why? Because they have made you believe that they’re the best from the start. You keep hoping for that relationship to return to where it started. My friend, forget it. There was never a perfect relationship. They were just faking it, pretending to win your trust and love because they knew their evil intention. The toxicity will eat you from the inside. The moment it comes outside, you are finished. Some go through severe depression from such toxic relationships without realizing it and it’s bad. Even when you speak out, some people can’t see how damaged you are emotionally unless it’s physical. That’s when the reality will sink in. And again, the manipulator will manipulate those around you not to believe your story. They will cover their tracks so their deeds go unnoticed.” – Mabutho
“It is difficult to have a loving relationship with someone who sees everything as all about themselves as that can also contribute to social, and psychological abuse and trauma or domestic violence at the hands of their partner. But with professional help and committed self-reflection from that narcissist, there is liberation.” – Joshua, Francistown
“Narcissists are manipulative and charismatic. They exploit others in a relationship and are abusive to their partners because everything is about meeting their own needs. It’s unhealthy to date a narcissist.” – Bachala
“It’s not healthy to be in a relationship with a narcissist. They can be so draining. They’re also very sensitive and can’t take criticism easily. Signs include an inflated sense of importance, feeling entitled to people’s time and attention, requiring a lot of attention and admiration, feeling superior to other people, only associating with equally superior people, and secretly feeling insecure.” – Mpho
“It’s challenging to their lack of empathy and constant validation. But with professional help and commitment, and self-reflection, there’s a place and space for hope.” – Brio Gaborone
“Narcissists love attention and want to be admired. They like empathy. They cannot love wholeheartedly. Being in a relationship with a narcissist drains emotionally and also narcissists like to associate themselves with successful people.” – Pearl Gaborone
A narcissist will make you feel worthless when they abuse you. They’ll make people outside believe that your relationship is everything to be admired, love, trust, honesty, and all the good traits. Now imagine if people are given that rosy picture whereas you are being abused emotionally, and physically, some would find it hard to believe you when you speak up. To that narcissist, you are nothing despite them professing undying love for you. Your success is a competition. Some can hit and insult you and even pin the blame on you. To them, you are the problem. Everything is your fault. They give people the impression that you are the problem, telling all kinds of stories. And when you try to talk to people, asking for help, nobody believes you. What then do you do in such a situation?
If you are in that kind of relationship or you know somebody trapped in that kind of a relationship, I believe, like what Brio said, with professional help and commitment there’s hope. Join me on this journey as we unveil the truth behind narcissistic love.
Do not hesitate to contact us. Visit our website at www.hazelmaseko.com or you can email us at hazelspeaks2020@gmail.com. Be rest assured that you are not alone.